Ethiopian adoptee advocating for better cultural support for families

A Perth woman who was adopted by a West Australian family after her parents died in Ethiopia is sharing her story to help older adoptees hold onto their cultural identities.  

Meseret Cohen was 13 years old when she and her three siblings were thrust into a new life with a Busselton family.

She said being adopted as a teenager was difficult because she had already spent her formative years in Ethiopia.  

Ms Cohen now provides consultation, coaching and peer support to adoptees and their families to provide the kind of guidance she said would have been useful to her and her family.

"You have all the worldview and the values that you bring with you, and then knowing that you have to completely shift and put that away, was how I dealt with life," Ms Cohen said.

"By the time I was 18 I actually completely lost my language and my family and heritage."

Ms Cohen, now 27, found herself in an orphanage when aged nine following the deaths of her mother and father in Ethiopia.

Siblings lucky to stay together

She said it was fortunate that the orphanage prioritised keeping the siblings together and refused to let the children be adopted separately.

"In the adoption world, the younger the better, they'll often say, and my sister had a lot of offers quite young," Ms Cohen said.

"But it took about four years [before] the nun at the time that took care of us found a family that was willing to take in all of us."

Ms Cohen said she spoke very little English when she arrived in Australia and started school.

Although her parents tried to accommodate her culture, she felt at times that there was no space in her life to stay connected to her heritage.

She said her advocacy work enabled her to connect adoptees and adoptive families to better support networks.  

Finding support

Ms Cohen said Relationships Australia was among the services that offered post-adoption support services, or advocacy groups such as Intercountry Adoptee Voices, where she personally found a sense of community.    

"Adoptees don't come with a clean slate, as much as you … want them [to]," Ms Cohen said.

"Especially the older they are. Being open to their cultural heritage will help them adapt and live a better life later on."

Ms Cohen is also working on a podcast called Life After Adoption, which dispels myths about what it is like to be adopted.

Support needs longevity

Kayla Curtis, the senior counsellor for the Intercountry Adoptee and Family Support Service (ICAFSS), which provides free counselling for adoptees and their families, said helping adoptees maintain their cultural identities was a big part of providing support. 

"All adoptees deserve to know who they are and where they come from," she said. 

"And keep connected with the cultural heritage of their birth countries as much as possible." 

She said it was important that support services were available long beyond the initial transition period. 

"Adoption is a lifelong journey for adoptees and their families," Ms Curtis said.