Report Psychological Examination Rahul by Anneke Vinke

Informal translation from Dutch.

Report Psychological Examination

‘Rahul’  ( name changed) 

Birthdate

Contractor:            Court Zwolle-Lelystad

Execution:            Ms. Dr. J.G. Vinke

Dates:                             24 and 30 September 2010

Report date:                    4 November 2010

Short history and context of the examination: 

In 2007 it comes out via the media that in an Indian children’s home possibly children have been put for adoption, who were not officially relinquished by their parents. 

An Indian couple steps out, that lost a child and recognized their child on pictures: Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms. Nagarani. Their in 1999 disappeared child would have been adopted by a Dutch couple. They wan certainty about their suspicions and request DNA test and at a positive match a contact and visit. 

The matter gets a lot of media attention. Several court cases follow, of which the last one in June 2010. The Indian couple comes for this courtcase to the Netherlands. 

Adoptive parents and Rahul are invited to tell their story for the court. They do not do this and decide not to cooperate wit the requested DNA testing. In order to establish if Rahul is capable to oversee the consequences of his decision not to cooperate, both on short as long term, the Court Zwolle requested an examination. In this examination the following questions need to be replied to:

1. How is the cognitive, social and emotional development of Rahul?
2. How is the development of identity and self image of Rahul (with special attention to his adoption background
3. How does Rahul experience the relation with his adoptive parents (with special attention for attachment and loyalty?
4. In how far is Rahul by his adoptive parents informed about his roots? Does Rahul have (or had) interest in his background and if yes, at which age and how was this expressed
5. In how far is/was Rahul capable to make the choice to (or not to) search for information about his biological parents and to contact them (or not). Can he make choices in conformity with his age? Is he being influenced by feelings of loyalty to his adoptive parents?
6. How does Rahul experience the search that his – alleged – biological parents have started
7. How does Rahul experience the current court case between his adoptive parents and the – alleged – biological parents?
8. Did Rahul think about the possibility that a DNA test does not have a positive match? Has Rahul thought about the possibility that a DNA test gives a positive match?
9. Can Rahul oversee the consequences of the choice of doing, or not doing, a DNA test? If DNA test shows that his – alleged – biological parents are indeed his biological parents, which psychological effect will this have on him?
10. Can Rahul  deal at this moment of his life with the possible consequences of the requested DNA testing?
11. Is it in the interest of Rahul that he gets clarity about his biological parentage? If it would become clear that his – alleged – biological parents are indeed his biological parents, is it then in the interest of Rahul that he has contact (in whatever form) with these parents and their family members. 
12. Has Rahul thought about the possibility that in case of turning down of the request of the –alleged – biological parents there may be an appeal and ongoing media attention for a long time? 
13. In how far has Rahul fears that his –alleged- biological parents want to take him to India?
14. In how far are there any issues coming from the investigation that are not part of these questions, but are of importance to the development of Rahul?

Focus of the examination 

The Court requests examination of the minor. This means that in this report only the perspective of the minor is presented. Interests of the adoptive parents and the alleged biological parents are outside the limits of this examination. 

Theory

The development of an adopted twelve/thirteen year old

Development of children goes globally in phases. Experts say that each child in each phase will have to complete certain tasks (development task) and that parents must help them with that (raising task). Important for adoptive families is that sometimes a phase has been skipped, and that an older child can show behavior that absolutely not fits the calendar age. Still one needs to react on this behavior as if it concerns a younger child. That can ask a lot from adoptive parents and ortho-pedagogic can sometimes help, but: the most important point is that something is only a problem if the child or the parent or school experience this as a problem. Stakeholders can only have their own measurement for this. 

It is important to continuously have attention for the adoption specific question that can come up in raising the child. After all, adoption is so part of the live of the adoptive family that sometimes the special character of it is forgotten. To keep an eye on the specificity of adoption, without it overruling all, counts as such as protective and is an important factor for good working adoptions. 

The most important development task as of 12 year is the development of identity versus role confusion. The teenager develops an own identity in relation to schooling and profession, politics, religion and sexuality. There is much influence in the teenage years and adolescence for the peer group. It is important to become emotionally independent, to develop own values and norms, to socialize with people their own age, boys and girls, to complete school and to deal with separation and individuation. In the young adulthood (around the 18th year) the child has shaped relations outside the family, has found a place in the society and chose its role. Adoption specific is in this phase to again learn to deal with the double par of parents that adoptees have: the adoptive parents and the birth parents. Interest in roots, culture of the birth country and the choice to, or not to, search is then the choice of the child. 

Adoptive parents have as task to accompany their child by giving it autonomy, to support in schooling and relations and to put borders related to age. They are the safe basis from where a teenager makes the step to the world. To deal with the difference between regular and triadic family and to respect and stimulate the specificity f the child are especially for adopted children important. 

Trauma

In the situation of Rahult we are confronted with the theme trauma and loss of control. With an acute one off (type I) psycho trauma it concerns a dramatic happening like a natural disaster, whereby there is direct and acute danger, for yourself or for the people around you. The search of the alleged biological parents and in particular the way in which the media have dealt with that, have meant an intense far, powerlessness and disgust. In the beginning there was an attempt of contract through the closeness of involved organizations, but at a certain moment all this landed with Netwerk and the private dilemma of if and when contact could be established, landed into the public debate.  Herewith the freedom of choice of Rahul and his adoptive parents, and their speed and timing of an eventual contact, went to the background. 

The media attention made that the family had to flee for journalists (move), adoptive parents got health problems and Rahulwas very stressed (see also report of the family Doctor). The Adoptive mother reports also nightmares and enuresis in that period. Children with problems often have sleeping problems and other behavior that goes with a younger calendar age (for example enuresis). That is a normal reaction to a dramatic happening. The whole has been experienced by the involved as traumatic. 

Typical for trauma are loss of control, acute destabilization, extreme feeling of powerlessness and extreme feelings of dissatisfaction. Spontaneous healing we see especially if there is safety and the possibility to regulate stress from there, a strong social network with stable and safe attachment relations and the possibility to speak about what happened. 

However, trauma can only be dealt with if a situation is stable and there is no treath that the happening will be repeated (DSM IV-TR) De JOngh & Ten Broeke, 2008; Greenwald, 2009; Struik, 2010)

Against this background, the information that came from the interviews and the material will be interpreted. 

Methods etc. 

Description methodology etc. (not translated)

Findings

General impression

On 24 September 2010 I meet the family B. at their house. I speak first with the parents and around half four Rahul comes home. I am cordially received, on the TV an Indian film and the house has an Indian ambiance. It is special that a child from India can be raised in a Hindu family, so that from the first day of the adoption a bond is maintained with the birth country of the child. 

Despite all the tension that the talking about this subject gives, the parents are open and prepared to tell me their side of the story. I appreciate that a lot because it costs them and Rahul a lot to relive this. The tone of the discussion is good, open and cordial. Rahul enters calmly, joins in the ongoing conversation and I feel a good bond between parents and Rahul, where mutual respect and space for each others opinion are central. Several times during the conversation the mother explicitly indicates that it is good to talk without parents, that she does not want to steer Rahul in this. I see that Rahul gets space and on a adequate way takes is parents into account. He sets out his own way and gives his own opinion, about which he seems to have though independently. I find the interaction between parents and Rahul good and open. There is no case of a beforehand agreed line, the conversation is open and the ambiance trusted. Rahul and his parents do not like it that there is renewed attention to the case and that an examination has been ordered. They are prepared to cooperate. I let Rahul chose if he wants to come 1 whole day to my, or twice a halve day. Rahul chooses the first option and on 30 September he comes to my practice for the examination. He is brought by his father and I calm and open. Round lunch time, his mother calls who wants to know how things are going. I am not present at this phone conversation. We work hard, the ambiance is open, there is a good contact and I am able to gather all the needed information. 

From the first conversation and the file, the following appears: 

On 10 February 1999 Rahul is formally relinquished for adoption and taken into care in Malysian Social Services and on 29 October 2000 taken into the family B. Mediation was done via Foundation Meiling. Everything was done according to law, international treaties and agreements, what is confirmed by the paperwork.

Many things have happened over the years. It started in 2006 when Rahul one day opened the door and an Indian man was there, with children. This man, Mr. Dohle, was let in by his parents. There was some talking and despite Rahul not understanding what was said, he felt the tension. The message was that there was a couple in India, Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms Nagarani, whose child was kidnapped on 9 March 1999. 

That child would be Rahul. They recognized Rahul on pictures. In February 2007 the family B. gets a letter of the Indian police with the communication that their child is kidnapped, and DNA testing is required in India. By phone they are summoned to bring their child back to India. 

Adoptive parents tell they felt totally overtaken. First by the visit, then by the letter and the forcing tone of the Indian authorities. It has always been the intention to look for the biological parents together with Rahul, but at the moment that Rahul would want this. Now it happened to them. The media circus that happened has made the making of informal contact, and together with MR. Kathirvelu and Ms Nagarani to see what is possible and not, impossible. 

The media and the claims have distorted the family life and for a part took away Rahuls youth, so say the adoptive parents. Rahul reacted to this stressful and threatening situation with bed wetting. Via the media there are claims for contact, respectively the return to India. That creates a lot of dust in the private domain of the family and their adoption becomes a public good. 

Questions by the Parliament follow, and the Ministry of Justice orders three investigations

[…]

In the file all reports are integrally present. Oosting concludes that there was a limited supervision, that the supervision structure was insufficient and that there should have been earlier signals direction the Ministry that should have led to action. The Youth Inspection concludes that Meiling kept to the law, but that checking on pureness and carefulness did not work, too much was done orally and not all was kept in writing. These point and suggestions for improvement are taken over by the Ministry of justice. 

Concerning the legal implications Mr. Vlaardingerbroek says that in any case a cancelling by the Indian judge of the Indian guardianship, the family relations with the biological family would be re-installed. That has only consequences for the Dutch adoption if that will be followed by a procedure to cancel the Dutch adoption sentence. It is then up to the Dutch judge to decide which importance it will give to the Indian ruling. 

The fear that Rahul would have to go back is omnipresent. The investigation reports show that also the legal framework of the Dutch adoption – if there would be a positive match – may not be able to protect Rahul for claims from India. 

Rahul and his parents choose not to cooperate with a DNA test and request media silence. 

After 2007 this seems to happen. In the meantime the family moved to a secret address and moved in 2009 back to their current house, Rahul changed school and bit by bit peace came back. In and with the surroundings they speak very limited about the case.

In 2010, however, the case revives, when Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms Nagarani ask for visiting rights and information about Rahul. The media-attention revives and again there is a court case. 

Adoptive parents and Rahul let themselves be represented by their lawyers. Rahult chose to tell his story to the special curator. He is very firm in his choice not to want to give any DNA material at the moment. Rahult did not make use of the invitation of the court to tell there what he finds. 

Adoptive mother indicates that she is grateful to the mother of Rahul. She would have liked to meet Ms. Nagarani, independent of the fact of she is the biological mother or not. The meeting that was organized for June this year, when the Indian couple was in the Netherlands, did not take place. The situation became more complex when Mr. Kathirvelu and Mrs Nagarani chose to file a police complaint of kidnapping by the adoptive parents. The goal of this criminal procedure is to still force a DNA test.  That is in a criminal case  easier than in a civil case. 

Adoptive father indicates that it has hurt him a lot to be called in as a criminal by court and to be accused of things with which he had nothing to do and does not want to be connected with. Family B.  has followed the formal procedures for adoption and turned to a licensed mediator (Meiling). During the conversation one can feel this is a painful issue, whereby I see the involvement and care for each other. There is a positive way of involvement towards each other in the family and they find support among each other. 

Despite all stress and uncertainty, Ms. B. prays daily for the mother and father of Rahul in India. Together with her husband she follows Rahul in his decision about DNA. 

Her son’s desire is central for her and for Mr. B. and they will support him in this unconditionally. He has indicated clearly that he does not want it. The reason Rahul gives for this is that there is no guarantee that it stops after giving DNA. The media will continue to deal with it: if he gives DNA, but also if he refuses. They all have an opinion. The privacy border has been overstepped for Rahul. If he googles, everything can be found and Rahu; is afraid that het classmates will google his name as a joke, and then find all that was written about him. This gives Rahul existential uncertainty which he can only just handle. Mother says at the end of the conversation that Rahul recently started with visits to a psychologist in the hope that it can bring him some rest. 

Testresults

[…]      description of methodology (not translated)

Summarized image: 

Rahul is a balance boy of almost 13 year who as well as cognitive, emotional as at social level functions age adequate. There are – apart from the theme DNA testing, the media and what he calls ‘the adoption case’ – no signals of fear, behavior or emotional problems. 

It is very strong of Rahul that he functions so well and balanced, formulates so well considered and has thought well about all possible scenarios with which he could be confronted. He gives evidence to be able to think in a differentiated way about the situation now, about being adopted and about eventual contact or DNA testing. He takes in this the perspective of his adoptive parents, as well as the – alleged – biological parents. With the last it is clear that Rahul has problems with the fact that they put their desire for certainty above all and do not take into consideration what he wants and how he wants it. That makes that for the moment he does not feel the need for information or contact in whatever form. 

So Rahul develops well. He is somewhat stronger in the processing of visual than language/auditive information. This makes the images that were broadcasted of Ms Nagarani as if burned on his eyes. Her fighting position in the documentaries gives Rahul an image he can not let go. This together with the medical history in the file where it becomes clear that there are complaints that are related to stress and possibly the underlying trauma. In the meantime psychological help has started. 

Rahul and his adoptive parents have a close, warm bond that is based on mutual respect and protection. Rahul feels himself connected with his adoptive parents and family and feels appreciated by them. India is omnipresent in his daily life and is part of him and his adoptive family. 

In general he is cheerful, spontaneous and caring. He knows he is adopted and considers this as positive and his birth parents have a place in his personal history. He only does not want to meet them nor does he wants to take steps to come into contact with them The pressure he feels is replied by his refusal to give DNA material. He wants to follow his own way in this. 

Conform is ego-stadium (ZALC) he wants to decide himself when he takes steps direction India. Now he wants to finish his education and one day he will himself take steps to find out who his birth parents are and what the reasons where for the fact that he was adopted. For the moment this is not a theme for him. 

He develops harmoniously and has a position in both the Dutch as the Hindu community. I guess that when this place is stable and unthreatened, Rahul will at a certain moment make himself the choice to find out who his birth parents are. He oversees that his decision not to give DNA now has consequences for Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms. Nagarani, but weights this against the possible consequences for himself of a positive or negative match. A DNA test is only the beginning and would it come to a match, procedures for contact and visits will follow. Rahul t does explicitly not want this. He is not busy with this, not ready for it AND protects himself and his adoptive parents who have been accused by Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms. Nagarani of child trade. 

He gives evidence to be able to think in a differentiated way about the situation now, about being adopted and about eventual contact or DNA testing. From the SCVT it appears that Rahul more than average the case, is able to take the perspective of others. He takes in this both the perspective of his adoptive parents, as of the – alleged – birth parents. With the last it is clear that Rahul has difficulties with the fact that they put their desire for certainty above everything and take no account of what he wants and how he wants it. It makes him to an object while he clearly and precisely states that in his opinion the wish and the possibilities of the child must be leading for whatever form of contact.  These wishes were breached in the courtroom by alleged biological parents. Nevertheless he speaks about them with respect and also the adoptive parents are full of understanding and compassion. Adoptive parents have respected the wishes of Rahul and conformed their actions with that. That has strengthened the bond between Rahul and his adoptive parents. This all makes that for the moment he has no desire for information or contact with alleged biological parents in whatever form.

In fact we can state that that it is no question IF DNA will be given, but it has become a timings question. Rahul states that there will come a moment that he will want to know more. That moment is not now and he moves this moment till his adulthood (after 18 year). If we look at the development task of adoptees, then this can be called fitting. 

The adoption case, the total loss of control on he own life and the fact that all is on the internet is a trauma for Rahul. By deciding not to give DNA, he takes back a part of control over his life. He oversees the consequences for all parties and has made a well informed decision about this. 

In relation to difficult subjects Rahul has in general positive coping strategies, like to concentrate on positive issues, positive her interpretation, acceptance, concentrate on planning and relativate. Apart from the adoption case, he seems to make use of catastrophizing and blaming others as strategy. That as such is also fitting because this happened to him (outside his blame or doings of him or his adoptive parents) and is all appeared much more serious in particular because of the media, then they could have ever thought. To relativate as strategy did not work here: the claim of Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms. Nagarani is for him catastrophic. Still this is continuing, as now a criminal case was started, what not only concerns Rahul but is an attack on the people who are most dearest to him and give him certainty in his existence: Mr and Ms. B.. 

1. How is the cognitive, social and emotional development of Rahul?

Rahul develops age adequate. He is intelligent and socially able. His able to take the perspective of others and shape his own opinion. He states his opinion in a calm, differentiated and well-thought way. 

1. How is the development of identity and self image of Rahul (with special attention to his adoption background

Rahul knows that is was adopted and this is for him no issue at this moment. He feels himself tied to the Surinam-Indian family and has a positive self image, sufficient self confidence and encounters the world openly. An exception must be noted: about the adoption case Rahul is uncertain and feels powerless. In general he uses the strategy of catastrophizing and blaming others. By not cooperating to the DNA test he gains again control over his life and his process in seeking out who he is and which role India and his Indian parents play. That is age adequate.

1. How does Rahul experience the relation with his adoptive parents (with special attention for attachment and loyalty?

Rahul and his parents have a good bond. There is a safe bonding relation with both. Also Rahul is very loyal to his adoptive parents. 

1. In how far is Rahul by his adoptive parents informed about his roots? Does Rahul have (or had) interest in his background and if yes, at which age and how was this expressed

Parent have informed Rahul t about his adoption when he was very young and pray daily for the birth parents. The decoration of the home shows that India and Hinduism is daily present. 

Rahul has a natural interest in India. Both Rahul and his parents are daily busy with India : in musik, in films and at home. The Indian birth family has a place in the daily life of the family and they speak very respectful about India and theh –alleged- birth parents. Adoptive mother is grateful that she may care for Rahul and can be his mother. Rahul honors that place, but wants at the moment no other place or role for India and/or family in India.

1. In how far is/was Rahul capable to make the choice to (or not to) search for information about his biological parents and to contact them (or not). Can he make choices in conformity with his age? Is he being influenced by feelings of loyalty to his adoptive parents?

Rahul gets from the adoptive parents all space to go his own way and make his own choices. They react responsive and sensitive. He is a careful boy and will in his choice consider his parents, but also enough independent thinking to go his own way if he would wish another way than his parents. The fact that there now is a criminal case started by the alleged birth parent complicates everything. This, in my view, leads to the fact that Rahul will do anything possible to protect his father and mother. Would DNA testing show there is a match, then this can hurt his parents. He will want to prevent that, because he loves his parents and they love him. He feels strongly bonded but gets from them all space (also emotional) to make the choices he finds fit. 

1. How does Rahul experience the search that his – alleged – biological parents have started

Rahul experiences this search at threatening and traumatizing. Not the fact that he is searched, but the loss of control that may follow is scary. The fact that there could be claims that do not take into account what he wants and how he would want contact, is threatening for him. Complicating factor is that everything about the search, opinions, facts, images can be found on the internet. Rahul is in a healthy manner appreciating his private life and that is now thrown onto the street. That is difficult and damaging to him. 

1. How does Rahul experience the current court case between his adoptive parents and the – alleged – biological parents?

Rahul experiences this court case as seriously threatening. There is a fundamental fear that his life will once more be thrown upside down and that he will loose the control and freedom of choice that he has now. 

The court case touches his certainty of existence. He can handle that just, but would there be given in to the complaint of the Indian couple about kidnapping by the adoptive parents and a court case take place, then I estimate that Rahul would be seriously damaged by this. 

1. Did Rahul think about the possibility that a DNA test does not have a positive match? Has Rahul thought about the possibility that a DNA test gives a positive match?

Both possibilities Rahul thought about and considered. Rahul chose to limit the damage for himself and his family as much as possible. No DNA giving and the decision to postpone to 18 years, seem the choice that he can oversee and that has at the moment as less as possible consequences for his daily life. 

1. Can Rahul oversee the consequences of the choice of doing, or not doing, a DNA test? If DNA test shows that his – alleged – biological parents are indeed his biological parents, which psychological effect will this have on him?

Rahul  is, in my opinion, qua intelligence and personality capable to take this decision. 

The decision is not given in by one-sided fear or one-sided loyalty to his adoptive parents, but a well considered decision about how he wants to live his life now. 

In that is no place for his eventual birth parents.

In case a positive match would be without any implications, obligation of contact or visit rules, then Rahul would consider DNA testing. It will for his functioning not matter if he gets certainty or not about the relationship with Mr. Kathirvelu and Ms Nagarani. He would not want to do anything with it no. 

The current threat of contact, visits and claims of the Indian family is what complicates the situation and makes that he decides not to cooperate. 

1. Can Rahul deal at this moment of his life with the possible consequences of the requested DNA testing?

A DNA test Rahul could handle, not the consequences. The consequences of a contact in casu a visit arrangement, would destabilize Rahul seriously, I think. Whereas he functions stable, a renewed confrontation with trauma is not good. 

The trauma of 2007 is, in my view, not yet dealt with. It is adequately stored and normal life resumed. Rahul did this fluently. Rahul indicates he started consulting a psychologist. 

1. Is it in the interest of Rahul  that he gets clarity about his biological parentage? If it would become clear that his – alleged – biological parents are indeed his biological parents, is it then in the interest of Rahul that he has contact (in whatever form) with these parents and their family members. 

At this moment Rahul is not busy with his biological family. I consider it important that Rahul speed is decisive for all actions related to parentage, contact and visiting right. The child need, in my view, to be in control because only then Rahul will be able to complete his development path satisfactory.

1. Has Rahul thought about the possibility that in case of turning down of the request of the –alleged – biological parents there may be an appeal and ongoing media attention for a long time? 

Yes, Rahul thought about it and fears it. He wants especially to stop all media-attention. He needs privacy and his timeframe in this needs to be honored. 

1. In how far has Rahul fears that his –alleged- biological parents want to take him to India?

Rahul can not oversee the consequences of an eventual match on DN. He rather does not want to pay attention to this and that is easiest if there I no DNA testing. 

There is fear that there will be an obligation for Rahul to go to India: in the media there have been several statements that made this fear realize. He does not want that and so he tries to use the strategy that most certainly prevents this. He wants eventually to go to India one time, but in his own timeframe. Preferable when he is adult. That would put him as equal partner to other adults. Self decision is very important for Rahul. 

1. In how far are there any issues coming from the investigation that are not part of these questions, but are of importance to the development of Rahul?

Rahul is through all of this traumatized. He has thanks to his stable personality, intellect and the stable home situation, been able to put this aside, but the trauma of 2007 and subsequent years has, in my view, now been addressed. Dealing with this needs to be prioritized and a renewed trauma must be prevented. 

All in all there is a timing problem whereby the timespeed of the alleged biological parents is many times higher than that of Rahul. Hereby Rahul risks getting into problems. When Mr Kathirvelu and Ms Nagarani let time do its work, and are prepared to give Rahul the space he needs, he will at his own time make the choice that will be livable for him then. It is important to wait for that moment, and to give Rahul the space to complete his school education so that he in his own way, at his time can continue with his questions about root. 

Dr. Anneke JG Vinke

GZ psychologist