Rehoming Bulgarian child

Debby said:

October 17, 2013 at 2:48 pm

To: KR Taylor

That was not really a fair question.

Jenny WAS NOT born to her family and that “initial bond”, a mother has to her own newborn baby, cannot be compared to adopting any child who is not yours, biologically. Bonds take time to form. Many of these children are so mentally damaged from the lack of love and attention, they are not able to bond to anyone.

We, too, rehomed a child that we adopted from Bulgaria. She was MUCH more mentally delayed than we had been told or were prepared for.

You really have to be a person and a TEAM that is specially equipped to deal with the issues (and they are VERY SERIOUS issues and MANY of them) that these children present.

It is a very heartbreaking situation for anyone who has to go through this.

In my case, my husband absolutely felt overwhelmed with the special needs of our child. I too, felt overwhelmed, but I think women are more capable of dealing with the issues these children present, more than men can.

We saw our child’s issues in the orphanage but decided to bring her home to the US and find a family for her. It was a much better solution, than leaving her in the horrible situation (orphanage), that she was living in.

So $40,000 later, she has a new home but my hopes and dreams for a daughter are gone. Everyone says “at least you rescued her”. She is in a very good home. She seems very happy. For that I am thankful. But, for me, the story does not have a happy ending.

Don’t ever judge a situation that, you yourself, has not been through.