"It is a human right to know one's identity"

Adoptees must be allowed to know their biological origin. That is the opinion of Maria Klingsholm, who today still does not know why she was adopted from India. The information about her adoption is extremely sparse.

For a long time she did not give it a thought. Just wondering why she was treated differently from the other kids in town, and just trying to fit in. Maria Klingsholm was adopted from India and came to Denmark just four months old. She therefore does not remember any other parents than the Danish couple who have taken care of her since they picked her up at the airport. Today she is 39 years old and still does not know why she grew up in Birkerød and not Bangalore.

“I have not been told anything other than that it says in my papers that I was with my mother until October, when I was admitted to an orphanage. It does not say anything about why, "she says.

It also says she was born on September 2, 1974. She's not sure she believes that. As she says, "you can not know that." Just like she can only guess at what happened up until the adoption.

"I have always been told by my adoptive parents that my biological mother was probably dead or could not afford a child, and then I ended up as a street child," she says.

In Search of Her Story

When she gave birth to her daughter in her mid - twenties, she saw things from a different perspective. A mother's perspective. And the interest in finding his own biological mother and family was aroused. But with such a small child and without a travel companion, the hunt was postponed until last summer. Maria, her husband and now 14-year-old daughter flew off towards India.

‘We looked at my papers before we left. My dad gave them to me, that was the only thing he could do to help. I'm adopted by individuals, so I do not know if there would have been greater help by being from one of the major organizations. But we called the orphanage, which I had always been told I was from, "says Maria Klingsholm.

The family arrived in Bangalore in the south of India and knocked on the door of the orphanage. But they had no information about Maria.

“It was all a bit vague and weird. So we went to another orphanage where I might have been. It was written in the papers, but that was not what I had always been told. My parents have always said that I came from the first orphanage. It's strange, because it is not in the papers, but that was where I thought for almost 40 years I came from, "she says.

At the second orphanage, they were greeted by arrogance and sparse information. The orphanage would not hand anything over to Maria, but they promised to send an email. She has not yet heard from them. But before flying north again, they visited the hospital in Bangalore.

“They were very helpful. Some distance down the road. They found a book in which everyone who had been born all the way back to 1952 was written in, "says Maria Klingsholm.

"As we sit with the book, the employee says that there are four girls who were born there on September 2, 1974. We ask for the names. But then he pulled ashore. They would not give them to us. Now we had come so far that we had the book in front of us, and then they would not give us anything. "

Maria and her husband asked to speak to the head of the hospital. But they were told that Maria should just be happy she had had a good life. The names they could not give, because they did not know if the mother would not seek out, and then it was illegal to hand over.

“It was so frustrating when we had come this far. The Indians do not have a better attitude than the Danes. Everyone thinks one should just forget it and be happy. It's not because I'm not grateful. But even Danes want to know their origin, regardless of whether they have been adopted or not, "she says.

"Adoptions must be more open"

Although some have changed in the number of years Maria has grown up in Denmark, she wants adoptions to be made more open. For example, as with donor children who can have a conversation with their biological parents when they turn 18 years old. That, Maria could well imagine, should apply to adoptees as well.

‘I have been trying to find my family, and think if they were also looking for me or hoping to be found. Then it is terrible if there are some other people sitting and deciding that we must not find each other, "she says.

“One can well think what is really true. What is right. How much is being withheld and who is holding it back. "

That is why Maria thinks it is important that the adoptees are heard in the debate, more than is the case.

"I think the needs of the adoptee and not just the adoptive parents should be taken into account to a greater extent. It's not a product you sell, but it can feel like that. Just because a western couple can not have children, and must have one at all costs so fucking be with the information. "

Maria emphasizes that she is doing well today with her family and her job as a violinist in the Royal Chapel. She has no idea if she would have died or lived in poverty if she had not been adopted. She still has no idea why she ended up where she did either.

“I want to follow it to the door. We have almost considered finding a private detective. I want to do everything I can and know I have done everything I could. But I do not know what to do. I have never tried this before, "she says.

“It's not because I'm not happy. I just think it's a human right to know one's identity. "

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