Henk's desperate search for his out-of-home grandchildren

The shine of life has been gone since January 2020 with Henk Hoft and his wife. In that month, their three grandchildren were removed from their mother and her then boyfriend by order of the juvenile court and placed with foster families. Grandpa Henk has hardly seen them since. They were together once in the past two and a half years. That was when his wife was in the hospital.

Sitting on a bench in the outskirts of his hometown Lemelerveld, Henk tells his side of the story. A series of events is reviewed. The night he had to spend in jail after the threat was reported by Overijssel Youth Protection. That he contacted his grandson several times without permission from the authorities. And his unvarnished opinion on youth care and the National Expertise Team for Youth Protection. "That's mafia, scum. They are the real criminals. They just take the kids away from us."

The out-of-home placement

"It was chaos, that particular day in January 2020. It started with a phone call from our daughter. She asked if the children could stay with us for a while. No problem, of course that was possible. We have enough time and space. My daughter lived then for a while already eleven high in a small flat in Zwolle. I had often said that that was not a good place for the children to grow up."

poster

Grandpa Henk from Lemelerveld is angry with everything and everyone involved in the placement of his grandchildren. He only wants one thing: his grandchildren back.

"I was already holding the coat to pick up the grandchildren, when the phone rang again. I got my daughter on the line again. I didn't have to come anymore. The kids had already left. I said, 'What the hell. , where to then?' She replied that youth protection had taken the children. She didn't know where to go. They were just gone because my daughter would neglect them."

"Due to family circumstances, our daughter was going through a difficult period. Later I found out that her then boyfriend had reported neglect to Safe Home. Our daughter is doing well again. She no longer lives in that small flat in Zwolle, but with us. Along with her new boyfriend. A good boy."

The lack

"I miss the grandchildren. The lack just hurts. Because no one wanted to tell me where they were being cared for, I went looking myself. I now know where they are. Two live in a foster family, the eldest lives in a shelter. I I am convinced that this is at the expense of their well-being, the bond they have with each other and with their mother and the relationship with us."

At Overijssel Youth Protection they don't give a damn. I've been fighting those people for two years

Grandpa Henk

"It's been more than two and a half years since I've been able to see them. Our daughter has visitation rights. She sees them every two weeks. Never alone. There is always someone with me. My wife and I have to make do with photos and videos. We want nothing more than to hold them in our arms, hug them, do fun things with them. At Overijssel Youth Protection they don't flinch. I've been fighting with those people for two years."

The accusation

"I know they think I'm an annoying man and worse. They say I'm a big mouth, intimidating and threatening people. Those are their words, but I've never lifted a finger at anyone and I never will "Yet I had to go to jail for one night last summer. A youth counselor had reported a threat. They are really not wise if they think I would harm someone. My wife is in poor health. It is important to her. that I'm home a lot. I can't leave her alone for long."

"In their eyes I'm going too far. I just want my grandchildren back. That's all. I'll have to go to court soon, I don't know when yet. Let the judge rule. I'm sure I'm innocent. What they "Doing it, that's criminal. They just rip the grandchildren out of our lives. I have offered everything: The children can come and live here, we have enough space. The beds are already ready, but I can't get anything done."

The expertise team

"Because of my - in their eyes - cross-border behavior, they have brought in a special team, the National Expertise Team for Youth Protection (LET JB). Well, I can't get anything done with those people either. They also keep me on a leash. I still have no contact with the grandchildren. What they are clear about is that they say the children will not come back to my daughter.”

We are aware that we are intervening in the lives of families and children

Ruud Brinkman, Youth Protection Overijssel

The complex case

Director Ruud Brinkman of Youth Protection Overijssel is aware of the case. Although he does not specifically want to go into the situation of the children and the behavior of Grandpa Henk, he does say that the LET JB team was not just brought in. "This is a very complex case, involving significant threats. As a director, I am responsible for the safety of my people. We are increasingly confronted with aggression against our professionals, but this remains an exceptional case. We are aware that we intervene in the lives of families and children. We often work well with the parents."

Although grandfather Henk, according to Brinkman, has crossed various boundaries due to his behavior, there is still talk with him about visiting arrangements with his grandchildren. "In everything we do, we work in the interest of the children. If contact with grandpa is important in this case, then we are committed to that," says Brinkman.

The despair and the sadness

The SOS Youth Care Foundation has been critical of the way in which youth protection is arranged in the Netherlands for years. The foundation has a lot of contact with parents who often disagree with the decisions of youth care. Grandparents also know where to find the foundation. Ranada van Kralingen of SOS Youth Care confirms that grandfather Henk is certainly not the only grandparent who misses his grandchildren. "But in the way he works, he is," says Van Kralingen. "Many grandparents are intensely sad and desperate. They do not threaten youth care workers."

Van Kralingen: "He is indeed the grandfather of three grandchildren, but he has no authority over them. And without authority you have no claim. However, a certified institution (read: Overijssel Youth Protection) should do the utmost in connection with 'family life'. to promote contact. Unfortunately, that almost never happens. Family members left behind are not taken care of in this current system. In most cases, youth care is not help, but a punishment. So there is no understanding or empathy for family members. The system (family law - ed.) has no legal position or legal protection for parents. Injustice forces people to do a lot."

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