Building a ‘wonderful family’ through adoption

Marshall couple finds good solution for their desire in becoming parents

MARSHALL — Jason and Amber Swenson wanted a family after they first got married, so they turned to the adoption system.

More than a decade later they’re the proud parents of two adoptive sons, Leo and Brayden. They adopted Leo in 2013 and Brayden in 2019.

They said they turned to adoption after efforts to have children on their own did not result in pregnancy. They chose it rather than going through fertility specialists.

“It just came up in a conversation one day,” Amber said. “We’d both had thoughts about adoption and were very interested in it. Things went forward based on that.”

They began by contacting Lutheran Social Services, and underwent about a seven-year process before adopting Leo. It included parenting classes, home visits by social workers and yearly background checks.

They considered both domestic and foreign adoption before opting to focus on adoption of a baby from within the United States.

“They’re both good possibilities,” Jason said. “We decided on domestic because of the number of children who need adoptive parents. They are kids right in our own backyard who need a good home.”

They said adoptive parents don’t buy an entire nursery or extensive amounts of baby clothes until the adoption is finalized. In each case, birth parents could have changed their mind before their termination of parental rights was fully processed.

“Adoptive parents have to guard their hearts at first,” Amber said. “It’s a real possibility that birth parents might change their mind. We just hope and pray that it all goes smoothly.”

After adopting Leo, they took several years to enjoy just having one child before deciding to give him a brother or sister.

“We knew we eventually wanted more than one,” Amber said. “Leo is the type of child who really enjoys being an older brother. We wanted him to have that opportunity.”

Jason and Amber are both educators. He’s the principal at Lynd Public School and she’s a title teacher at Southview Elementary in Marshall.

They said their jobs were part of the reason they chose to adopt. Their work experiences convinced them that they’d enjoy having children of their own.

“As educators, kids are a very important part of our life,” Jason said. “We wanted them to be part of our personal lives as well as our professions.”

They said one of the deciding factors in whether to adopt is the need to make the child the highest priority in all of life’s situations.

“Any decision to become a parent takes careful thought,” Amber said. “It’s not always an easy job, but there are many rewards every day. We’ve been asked if it’s the same to adopt as if they were our biological children, and we think it’s definitely the same. Kids love unconditionally and that leads to strong emotional bonds.”

Jason added that it’s important to expect a lengthy process to adopt a baby. Patience is important until the possibilities lead to success.

“People should be open to it, and they have to be patient,” he said. “It paid off for us. Adoption has given us a wonderful family.”

Emily Giese, an adoption social worker for Southwest Health and Human Services, said anyone with a commitment to being a parent can be considered. Adoption is open to single parents as well as couples.

She said the waiting time is much longer for babies compared to older children. In some cases with babies, up to 15 to 20 potential families are considered.

She said guidelines are set up based on the need to make the child’s well being the top priority. Social workers want to ensure that a family chosen for adoption is the best fit for the child.

“The adoption system is forever changing to meet the needs of children,” Giese said. “There is constant change to the policies and procedures for finalizing an adoption. The support system for adoptive parents after finalization has expanded as well.”

Altogether there are currently 46 children in foster care throughout the six Southwest Health and Human Services counties. A total of 26 are in pre-adoptive placements.

The agency had 22 adoptions finalized in 2021 and 11 so far this year. There were 191 Southwest Health and Human Services adoptions from 2000 until 2020.

Giese said it’s rewarding when children are placed successfully into their adoptive homes, when they can have the love and support of a permanent family.

“I like the opportunity to build relationships, especially when we can give the older children a sense of self worth and belonging,” she said.

“Seeing children succeed in homes where they’re shown kindness and love is a highlight of my job.”

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