Adoption is a difficult and lengthy process in India, especially for single women. In January 2014, Dr Mala Sharma (name changed) registered with the Central Adoption Research Agency (CARA) to adopt a child.She had tried private organisations earlier, like Missionaries of Charity, but failed repeatedly. "They'd question why I'm not married, who I stay with, how I'll bring up the child alone," recalls Sharma.
After registering with CARA, her name came up for the first referral in December 2015. A seven-month-old baby at a nearby Shishu Mandir was up for adoption. "They said there's a 48-hour window in which I can come and see the child, else it goes to the next person in queue. At that time each referral gave you a chance to meet three children. Now, only one is introduced. This one was premature so I requested if I could see the other two. By the time they got back, the referral window had expired and the baby went to someone else," recalls Sharma.
She got two more referrals. "Each time, they kept asking the same questions and delayed the process. Once I took my parents and brother with me to show that I do have a family and can take care of a child. But then they pointed out that my parents were old and needed care as well. I was asked how much property I owned, if I planned to get married... Basically , they discourage you if you are single. Or, they try to give you children with health problems that couples don't want," says Sharma. Finally , after three years of dogged effort, Sharma brought a one-and-half-year-old boy home this April. She's now 47.
A recent proposal passed by CARA may now make adoption easier for women like Sharma. Financially able, 40-plus single women will be given preference over others in the adoption process. Deepak Kumar, CEO, CARA, says the number of single women registering for adoption has been increasing in the past few years. "Right now we have a few hundred registered with us. This was an idea of the honorable minister (women and child development minister Maneka Gandhi). We just want to see how we can help single women over 40 with this process," says Kumar, adding that after three months the proposal will be up for a review.
This proposal comes at a time when the Surrogacy Regulation Bill 2016, if passed in Parliament, will ban single men and women from opting for commercial surrogacy , leaving adoption as the only legal way for them to become parents.