Hope and anger about cabinet plans for foreign adoptions: 'My life is extremely difficult'

From a slap in the face to hope for improvement: the fact that the adoption of children from abroad will soon only be possible through a government organization has caused mixed reactions.

Patrick Noordoven prepares a glass of water. He needs that when he talks about the suffering his adoption entailed. He was born in Brazil and grew up in the Netherlands after an illegal adoption in the 1980s. Lied against the state, which ignored adoption offenses like his and allowed, among other things, birth certificates to be forged, making it nearly impossible for biological trace family. When Patrick looks in the mirror, he wonders: who am I anyway?

That the government, which did nothing to treat him and other children decently, is now going to facilitate foreign adoptions through a special government agency, is a slap in the face. Foreign adoptions were suspended last February, after an extremely critical report by a committee led by Tjibbe Joustra. The committee concluded that too many abuses had taken place and that they occur 'to this day'. To continue would be irresponsible. Joustra advised to stop with foreign adoptions altogether.

The right to a child does not exist. The right to identity does

Patrick Noordoven

Right to identity

Patrick sent his first response to the cabinet plan to another adoptee: 'If adoptees could count on the same support as intended parents, my and other adoptees' lives would have been very different'. “There is no right to a child. The right to identity does.”

But Patrick lost his identity. Because of his illegal adoption, erased tracks and lack of support and understanding from the government. Even if it is a 'normal' adoption, it is still difficult for adoptees to get in touch with their roots. “You don't speak the language, you don't know the customs. Adoptive parents receive compensation when they adopt, they get leave. I have to do the search for my parents in my own time and finance it myself.”

Patrick has now succeeded in reducing the number of Brazilian men between his father and his father to 400, with the help of in-depth DNA and genealogical research. However, taking the final steps is seriously hampered, also because he is now again faced with an appeal in his case against the state. "That way I don't spend my time on what is most important: finding my father."

“The fact that the government is now continuing with foreign adoptions shows that the problems of the past are secondary to the wishes of adoptive parents. My life is very difficult. I now live in a third country, not in the Netherlands and not in Brazil, in order to settle in. I see around me that more and more adoptees need that. For me, the continuation of the adoptions through the government feels like an anecdote that I was told during my studies, about the only aircraft carrier that the Netherlands had.” While colonies all over the world became independent around the 1960s, the Netherlands sent that aircraft carrier to Papua New Guinea to hold on to its colony. “The Netherlands is now using such an aircraft carrier again.”

Professor: 'It didn't all go wrong'

Emeritus professor René Hoksbergen, previously also director of the adoption organization Wereldkinderen, is a 'great supporter' of the government's plans. “In this way, the child can be completely central, without financial or personal interests.” That also means: no more adoptions from other countries if the children can be accommodated there. "That children are taken from rich countries such as America or Taiwan, that is not possible."

And while the government has made mistakes in the past, that says nothing about how it will be arranged now. “The government failed mainly because nothing was done to steer adoptions in the right direction. It was long assumed that these were private initiatives and it was said: we do not interfere with it.” This resulted in distressing situations, for example in the case of illegal adoptions in Brazil, the country where in the 1980s women 'traveled without a child, but returned with a child', as if it were their own. “It is right that there is a lot of anger about that.” But what Hoksbergen also wants to emphasize: the majority of the adoptions went well. “It hasn't all gone wrong. Those adoptive parents have also done their utmost. ” But for them, because of the abuses of others, it sometimes feels as if there is also a stain on their blazon.

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